Day 88

This ones for Bekke. lol

DAY 5

Hm. I not sure what to say about today. I've decided I'm going to take what I consider a BIG risk. I'm not sure I want to blog about it but it's all that I want to talk about and it's the only thing on my mind. But in other news, dieting is weird. Sometimes I feel like I'm cheating because I get to eat and I'm satisfied with what I eat and how much. It just doesn't seem like I dunno enough. Or rather is seems like too much. Who knows. Only time will tell. I am at 135.9 according to my moms scale but I'm not even sure I believe that...

Day 4 - Imperfections

Today I slept in until 1:00 which NEVER happens. I think I needed it though. I can say with confidence that dieting is not at all as hard as I thought it would be. I'm really proud of myself with how well I'm committing to it. I had a hiccup today with some of my other compulsions, but I have a plan and I know what I need to do and how to handle it all. I think with dieting and not bingeing I'm learning how to flush out bad habits. I know I need to fix things in my life and it does feel like the right time to do so.
There is one thing that scares me though and it's my mood swings. The thing is, is that this isn't something new and it's been going on for awhile. It just seems to get worse. I used to say I have anger issues but I don't think I really did, but I do now. It scares me how angry I can get in just a short amount of time and I really do need to confront this problem. Just adding things to the list! this summer is officially about fixing my imperfections.

DAY 2 - Work

Well I made it! Day 1 is over and I'm an official high school GRAD! I feel good. I especially feel good about yesterday, I felt like I had enough to eat AND had calories left over! Waking up this morning with out bingeing last night felt great. Today I have work from 9-5:30 and a graduation party for a friend afterwords. I have a feeling today may be harder then I'm hoping. I just hope I have enough energy and don't cave and eat something from the cafe. I'm sure I wont because I have realized how easy it is to turn your head and look the other way. Keep calm and avoid the kitchen!

DAY 1 - Graduation

Well today I graduate and it's day one of operation "Get Skinny" The first breakfast isn't too bad. I'm not a huge breakfast eater but I guess I'm going to start to love it when the reality of no longer bingeing at night kicks in.

High School GRAD!

So, graduation is tomorrow as well as the beginning of my new binge: DIETING! This brings me to the fact that, JENNY CRAIG DOES NOT EXCEPT TYPE ONE DIABETICS. They discriminate because of ignorance. But whatever I'm just doing it on my own. (With the help of what I like to call skinny soldiers.) I got my two new lulu hoodies today which is awesome. They are both a bit snug, this is good because of the motivation factor :)
Another topic is the fact that I can not wait to be in NYC this coming september. I am so happy and excited its ridiculous. I'm excited about going to Australia in July too, BUT New York is my dream. Plus I WILL be the weight I want to be when I go there which actually means more then you'd think it does. All around things are starting to come together and I am the one that is making that so. It's going to be hard work, but I finally believe I want it bad enough.

Prom BUST!

So, my senior prom sucked. My date wasn't very charming. I didn't get dinner and I paid for half my ticket, parking and the ferry to seattle. Then he asked me to buy him cigarettes. Yes, I am serious and yes I dumped him. I could have protested, but I just wanted to go to prom. I just wanted my fairy tale prom, BUT apparently in his eyes I'm not worth a fairy tale prom. So I dumped, bought myself clothes, and got hit on by 3 dudes who are 10x better. I will be fought for because I AM worth it.
In other news, I called Jenny Craig and I have a 10 am consultation for tomorrow. I worked out today and plan to log my work outs. Current weight: 142 Goal weight: 115 (115 for my height isn't underweight FYI)
WISH ME LUCK!